The Business of Being Born

I finally got to watch this amazing film today!

Can I just say, I am SO glad that I had a natural home birth with Sam. That I researched, and knew what I wanted, and WENT FOR IT!
Because if I hadn't, and I had watched that documentary- I would be wishing I had.
I wish I had gone natural with all 3, but you can't change the past.
And of course- I have had 3 perfectly healthy, successful births. No major injuries, no cesarean sections. Happy babies that nursed like champs right away. I have no room to complain.

The only complaints I have about my first 2 births have to do with my comfort, my emotions, me, me, me.
But if any day should be about mom's comfort- should it not be the day she brings a new life into the world, with her very own body?

I don't want to go on and on about natural childbirth. If you are interested at all, watch the film. Be warned, it is an hour and 24 minutes long, but worth EVERY second. Especially if you are planning on giving birth like: EVER!
disclaimer: I'm not trying to sell natural or home birth to anyone. But my wish for EVERY woman is to be informed. If you are going to have a baby in any fashion- know what the hell is going on. Know what those drugs are that they are pumping into you. Know why things are happening. That's all. Do what you want to do- but KNOW what you're doing.
/soapbox

What I really am feeling today is pride. Pride in myself. Which I haven't taken the time to savor in the past 7 weeks and 5 days.
Almost everyone who has heard any details of Sam's birth has complimented me, Called me strong, brave, a hero, (crazy, lol)... my favorite is Elastigirl. ;-)
But I have been quite busy with the result of that birth, and those that came before it, and haven't patted myself on the back properly.
Sure, plenty of women do it. Plenty of women I know. But does that make the feat any less spectacular? I don't think so.

I gave birth without any drugs. I pushed a 10lb, 2oz child, with a 14.5 inch head, and a HAND right beside that head- right on out of my womb!
I DID THAT, people. Nobody helped me. They supported me, yes, but they did not share that workload.
And why was my child so large? Because I endured all of the discomforts of late pregnancy, and went on past the day I expected him to come. Kept my chin up for 9 extra days, because I knew that was best for him.

Forgive my gloating, but this has all really sank in today.
I just want to shout form the rooftops that I ROCK! I kicked major ass!
I was brave, strong, didn't give up or give in!

And the way I felt afterwards, it was like nothing I could even describe.
After I had Jacob and Lucy I felt ecstatic, in love, excited. Amazing.
After Sam was born I felt high. It was truly out of this world. And you can't now it unless you've felt it.
I will not downplay the way a mother feels after ANY birth, because I certainly felt a LOT when I had my first 2. Multiply that by 10 and you might touch on what I felt after my last baby was born.
I love my children equally, and uniquely. The birth was for me more than Sammy. No, I didn't want him in the hospital either, and had a whole list of reasons that I felt home was better for him.
But it was better for ME. And I had no idea how MUCH better until today. Until I saw and heard others describing what I had gone through, and *click* a floodgate of emotion opened. I bawled tears of joy.

So join me in celebrating, or just roll your eyes and move on to pictures of the kids. I don't care.
This was my victory. My battle fought and won. And if I were the only person proud of me (and I know I'm not) that would be enough.